Archive for the ‘ Cannot be confined by a definition ’ Category


I haven’t lived a hundred years and my hairs still have their colours intact. But what I’ve seen could make a beautiful love story and rival ‘Scary movie II’ all in one package. I have seen peace and pain all in one place. I have witnessed birth and I’ve seen people die. I’ve seen wealth and penury that will make a celestial church rat giggle. I wont dare say I have seen it all, cos that’s just plain impossible. I’ve experienced a lot of occurrences but nothing is as phenomenal as family; its like a flower, the petals look not too great apart, but alluring together. We all love family values and mostly we love our mothers and cherish and show it all on facebook on mothers’ day; but is it the same on fathers’ day? A mother’s love is imperative, but a father’s role is simple nonpareil.


I watched the elation on a young mans face when he saw his son take his first steps in life, the delight on his face, the protection he gives to the baby making sure he doesn’t fall. Its funny how automatically, some of these are thrown out of the window as soon as the mum is involved. I have seen a father sell his car to pay his son’s tuition, but will the song remember that? It’s a case of lion and hunters, history will continue to give the credits to the hunters until lions rise to write their own history.


Underrated and underappreciated by the society that believes that whatever a man does in the family is bleached in comparison to what a woman does regardless of the magnitude. Fatherhood isn’t all about inflating a ladies tummy, its more than that; anyone with nuts in between his legs can do that. The underestimation is so glaring that only Luther Vandross (RIP) and a very few others had the effrontery and were appreciative enough (and gay enough in Luther’s case) to have sang about their fathers. Songs dedicated to fathers are like Mercedes Benz wagon 1974 model on a Lagos road, while those dedicated to mothers are like danfo; everywhere. Don’t get me wrong, I love mothers (and ladies too) and I think they are inevitable doing the best, but then, I feel the fathers role is underrated.


As I said earlier, I have seen some crazy and shocking things and I can conclude that when a father-figure is missing in a child’s life, you can only patch it, like a car heavily hit from behind; the panel beater cannot make it new again. A fathers role might seem insignificant but it is as vital to a family, as the ignition is to a car. When you see a dysfunctional son, check his father, there is a high percentage that he’ll be dysfunctional too. Now, that is a failure being shown, but are the successful ones being celebrated?


I love the Boss Dada cos no one else could have done it like him. It goes beyond school fees and strict face. It’s when men don’t do their obligation that the heavy load now falls on the shoulder of the weaker one. As much as the bad ones are being pointed out, the good ones should be pointed out too. Look at Ib*; the archbishop if min*a, what do you expect his father to be like? Or the civilian dictator from Owu, some would argue that their fathers would have been better as faggots; that’s harsh, but rightfully so. Besides, Snoop Dogs fatherhood won’t tell you much about decent parenting.


Fathers should do more than put food on the table; they should be role models to the kids. And potential fathers should not repeat the mistake made by the parents. We don’t have to hit the same spot. Imagine what your life woulda been like if you didn’t have a dad, or how it would have been if you did. As much as we love and cherish our Momas, our Dadas deserve our love and appreciation too. I’m sorry to point this out but truth be told, often times, the mothers make the father the bad guy (Daddy will beat you!), and that makes the man more of a monster than a lover; often because of self gratification or personal vendetta against the man. Let us men do it right and celebrate fathers. Fathers are underrated and wrongfully so.


Rant over.